Patético lo mío.

Es oficial: me volví una workaholic.

I was bored so I did this.

o1. tell me the truth, what made you start liking the person you like right now?
He's the sweetest person there is in my life right now. He's a true gentleman, cute, and above all that he makes me laugh and smile nonstop. And I love the fact that he's not the kind of guy girls normally have a crush on.
o2. what on your body is hurting or bothering you?
My back. I need a massage ASAP.
o3. what was your last thought before going to bed last night?
"I wonder how he's doing back home..."
o4. what are you listening to?
Butterflies & Hurricanes (Muse)
o5. what's something you're not looking forward to?
I don't know.
o6. where do you think your best friend is right now?
Sleeping in her bed for sure.
o7. have you kissed anybody in the last five days?
Nope.
o8. sex on the first date?
I'd rather not.
o9. kiss on the first date?
Yes.
1o. is there one person you want to be with right now?
Of course there is.
11. are you seriously happy with where you are in life?
Yes, I seriously am.
12. is there something you would like to say to someone?
"I really, really like you. Please say you really, really like me back".
13. what are three things you did today?
Stayed in bed. Went to my Musical Theater Class (and did nothing, that was a blast). Blogged and tweeted.
14. would you rather sleep at a friend’s or have them over?
Have them over.
15. what is your favorite kind of gum?
Mint flavored.
16. are you friends with any of your ex boyfriends/girlfriends?
No. (I mean, I've never had an official ex, so...)
17. what is on your wrists right now?
Nothing.
18. ever liked someone you thought you didn't stand a chance with?
Yes.
19. does anyone have strong feelings for you?
I hope so!
2o. are you slowly drifting away from someone?
I guess so, though I constantly get that feeling about a different person.
21. have you ever wasted your time on someone?
Countless times.
22. can you do the alphabet in sign language?
No.
23. how have you felt today?
Gray. Sad. Tired. 
24. you receive $60 without any reason, what do you spend it on?
Books and CD's.
25. what is wrong with you right now?
I feel lonely.
26. is there anyone you're really disappointed in?
Yes.
27. would you rather have Starbucks or Jamba Juice right now?
A hot Starbucks.
28. why aren't you in "love" with your last ex anymore?
(not an official ex, just for the record) Because he's an idiot.
29. how late did you stay up last night and why?
I think I stayed up until 3am.
3o. when was the last time you talked to one of your best friends?
A few hours ago.
31. what were you doing an hour ago?
Blogging.
32. what are you looking forward to in the next month?
I'm looking forward to starting my college's next semester.
33. are you wearing jeans right now?
Yes.
34. are you a patient person?
Sometimes, but not really.
35. do you think you can last in a relationship for three months?
Yes.
36. favorite color?
Blue.
37. did you have a dream last night?
Yes, I had more than one, in fact.
38. are you wearing jeans, shorts, sweatpants, or pajama pants?
I said I was wearing jeans!
39. if someone could be cuddling you right now, who would you want it to be?
Him, obviously.
4o. do you love anyone who is not related to you?
Yes.
41. if someone liked you right now, would you want them to tell you?
YES.
42. do you like meeting new people?
Yes.
43. are you afraid of falling in love?
No, although it sucks to get hurt.
44. ever liked someone older than you?
Yes.
45. has anyone ever told you that you have pretty eyes?
Yes.
46. have you ever felt like you weren't good enough?
Countless times.

Let's be awkward together

Falling for someone is the most wonderful, yet the scariest feeling in the world. When you're not sure where life will lead but it's too much of an exciting adventure for you to care. When just the sight of someone gives you butterflies; when hearing them say your name gives you a warm fuzzy feeling running through your body. You get all these odd little feelings, and you're happy. But there's a little niggling feeling when you're apart that tries to discourage you. But then you see the other person again, and everything is better, everything is perfect.

Mariposas.

i was told there would be butterflies.

or maybe i just assumed it. i don't actually remember talking

about butterflies. but then again, i don't remember much.

i do remember the way the atmosphere cracked

under the pressure of your glance.

we always destroyed the air between us.

maybe we're the real cause

of all those holes in the ozone layer.

i wouldn't be surprised.

i was told there would be butterflies.

and instead i found global warming

(ap)

El final de la rutina.

Tengo que admitir que me estaba empezando a divertir el hecho de sincronizar mi día para estar cruzando el puente exactamente a las 13.55 todos los lunes y miércoles. Y verlo. E imaginarme historias y ver esos escenarios recrearse como una película en mi mente. A veces tenían un final feliz. Otras veces no. Y cada lunes y miércoles esperar a volver a cruzarme con su mirada como ese primer lunes que lo vi mirándome, y estaba sonriendo. Me aguanté la risa y me hice la estúpida hasta que el colectivo arrancó, y apenas me aseguré de que ya estaba lo suficientemente lejos, estallé. Pensé que todo había sido una gran casualidad, hasta que volví a verlo el miércoles, el lunes siguiente, y así fue por varias semanas. Me acuerdo ese miércoles que estaba completamente deprimida, y el simple hecho de verlo me devolvió la sonrisa, aunque sea por un rato. Pero ya no lo vi más. Creo que voy a tener que contentarme con la música que sale por mis auriculares o aprovechar de nuevo esas magníficas siestas de media hora que tanto me gustaban.

Y nuestras miradas nunca volvieron a encontrarse como aquella vez.